i have some sort of ridiculous right side chest pain.  it's making it harder and harder to breathe (lool).

go away pain, and don't come back.

also, why do people ruin good things? haha. although i have to say this is hilarious:

god i'm bored. 

don't worry guys, i'm happy with where i am, i promise.

i still think of all the embarrassing things i've done in the past and blush a bit to myself. i am the biggest dope of all

time.  it's funny how quickly a heart can regroup after being trampled on (not just romantically). well, at least regroup enough to not disclose all of its pain at once.  instead, it just comes back and hits you in short spurts of memories over time.  mini two minute clips of the past, sections of life that you try to forget but still hold onto for some odd reason.  and you're over it all, you definitely are, but it comes back to just prove that that part once existed.  it was important then, and it's important now. you'd be a fool to make those mistakes again, but you'd be a bit foolish to not make those mistakes in the first place.

i think one of the biggest fears anyone has is putting themselves out there, completely vulnerably, in hopes that the person or thing they're trusting will respond positively. 

not doing so, however, only leads to loneliness, emptiness, or longing.  

i know this is just restating what everyone knows. but it's hard to realize that it's the truth until you embrace it, over and over again, until you're no longer fearful of it at all.  

i don't want this harry potter bidness to end.


that being said, i'm probably going to see this last movie four times in the movie theater.

just like 7.1

this summer has been interesting to say the least

but i have an update, and it's a good one.

my labs came back normal. it appears as though the exercise and everything is paying off! i feel like a new woman right now with newfound energy and happiness.

also my cousins are going to be here thursday and i cannot be more elated. jaya, kaya, neha, priya, kripa, niyati, pinky ben, jaanki, kripa's two best friends and i are going to have the best weekend ever! it'll be nice finally enjoying the company of people my age around this town/st. augustine. haha.

i visited athens last week but didn't get to see all the people/do everything i wanted. but i'll be back there soon enough, and i'll get to hang out with everyone i care about, not just a select few. so i'm sorry i only saw about three people while i was there, my planning was all wack.